THE ASPIRE BLOG

Back when I lived in Massachusetts I drove a Jeep. It was great! Although, if I’m honest, a little bit more difficult to get into than any other car I’ve driven before (probably why I had to let it go). 

It’d been lifted, apparently? Someone told me that was the proper term for the big wheels it rode on. In my mind I looked young and cool when I drove it. I’m going to stick with that image and refrain from inviting other opinions, which I’m sure would reach quite the opposite conclusion. 

There was one aspect of the Jeep experience no one prepared us for when we got the car. As I drove about, minding my own business and maintaining the pretense of cool, other Jeep drivers were making hand signals at me. Specifically, it looked like they were giving me the Winston Churchill peace sign – first and second finger of the right hand standing above the steering wheel. 

I didn’t know what to make of this, but it was happening regularly enough that, being the cool dude that I was because I drove a Jeep, I realized it meant something. Being the cool dude that I am because I drove a Jeep, I did a little research.

There’s a Jeep Wave! And I was entitled to use it! Because I was  a cool dude with a Jeep!

Apparently owning a Jeep doesn’t just open up the opportunity to drive off road – if you have the confidence; I don’t! – it’s also an honor to be a member of this club alongside other like minded, bumpy ride-loving drivers! 

So, I did the Jeep Wave. I got more excited than I thought I should as I turned a corner and saw another Jeep approaching. I prepared my fingers, flexed them just to make sure I was warmed up, and then I let the wave go in all its glory. And oh what a thrill when I saw the wave coming back. I was part of the club! 

Membership brought with it downfalls, though. I confess to feeling very guilty when I forgot and another driver presented the wave. How must the driver feel I thought? Am I being snooty? I sometimes felt like turning my Jeep around to follow and apologize. And then the reverse happened – when I waved and I didn't get a response. What was wrong with me? Didn’t they like me? Was I not young and cool? 

Being part of something comes with benefits and also challenges. My Jeep club membership was a small and quirky experience, I know. It’s the strangest thing that people behind the wheel doing the Jeep Wave are all very different yet connected through the club of owning a Jeep.  

But in all seriousness, belonging is a critical part of life. It’s foundational to our sense of emotional safety and well-being. I was a newcomer to the club, but no one has told me to go home to my old car. Quite the opposite. The wave means “Welcome to the club.”

Belonging is a good thing. That’s not the problem. 

The problem comes when we start to think we are cool enough to own a Jeep and do the wave, and you are not. And in fact you don’t deserve to be on the road at all. So just get off the road and leave me and my Jeep alone.

We need more inclusive clubs, open to all. Just like Jeep drivers, we forget to wave sometimes and we may not feel good if we aren’t waved at. But being denied their proper place on the road of life is an indignity no one should have to experience. 

As healthcare workers, we should begin every day determined to greet every person we serve like they’re already members of the club. It’s central to creating a culture of inclusivity, and letting everyone know that Aspire serves ALL. Our “club” is everyone we serve and all of our partners in the community.

I wish everyone could feel as cool as I felt in my Jeep doing the wave – and to know they are welcome and safe, wherever the road of life takes them.